- A Question of Trust
- Intro: The Birth of a Blog
- You and Me Could Write a Bad Romance: Part I
- Bad Romance, Part II: The Couch
- Bastard Package #1
- Hallelujah
- Born This Way
- Baby Girl X
- Another Victim of Love
- True Life
- The Girls Who Went Away
- Love and Other Drugs
- 11 Things Adoptees Love to Hear
- Uh, Never Mind
- Adoptee Kid Lit
- Bastard Princess and the Search for the Holy Grail
- MYOFB
- Awkwardness
- Baby Steps
- Faith, Hope, and Catholic Charities
- Special Delivery
- Green-eyed Monster
- !@#$
- Pandora
- Fantasyland
- Adoptees You May Have Heard Of
- Big MAC Attack
- Material Girl
- VISA and Mastercard Accepted
- Don't Hold Your Breath
- Our Love is Like a Constipated Cat
- A Question of Trust
- Adoption, Hollywood Style
- All in the Family
Don’t Hold Your Breath
Every time the phone rings, I wonder if it’s the Midwest Adoption Center (MAC) calling. (Our cordless phone’s been dropped one time too many, and the digital caller ID panel doesn’t ID anymore; thus, we’ve reverted to the old-fashioned game of guessing who’s on the other end.) At any rate, lately I’ve been pretty good at picking up the adoption-related vibe—2 for 2 in the past week.
When LaKeisha from MAC called today, my heart leapt into my throat and my face flushed with heat. I grabbed pencil and paper to jot down any new info. “You marked on one of your forms that you want us to search DCFS records for your birth certificate, but not on another form. Would you like us to search DCFS records?” Disappointed, I told her sure, whatever. She also mentioned something about the confidential intermediary. That was it. More hurry up and wait. So now it could be up to 10 more weeks before we have any answers.
I also got a letter from DCFS’s Closed File Information and Search Service updating me on my request status. Next, closed DCFS files in a central storage facility will be searched for anything pertaining to my case, a process that could take several weeks to several months.
If this central file search fails, other agencies of DCFS will be contacted; this part might have to be repeated several times to gather all the relevant information. All of which could take several more months. If and when my files are found, I’ll be assigned a caseworker when one becomes available. If my files are NOT found, MAC will help me petition the court to assign me a confidential intermediary. At this point, in an attempt to stoke my dying patience, I’m trying to imagine myself a year from now, reflecting fondly back on the past year’s events and wondering why I ever doubted that everything would work out for the best. Lately it seems like there’s no end in sight. I also remind myself of the many searchers—parent and child—who have sought answers for a lifetime; it gives me the jolt of perspective I need to keep things in balance. I’ve only just begun to search. Will I be one of the millions who come up empty?
When LaKeisha from MAC called today, my heart leapt into my throat and my face flushed with heat. I grabbed pencil and paper to jot down any new info. “You marked on one of your forms that you want us to search DCFS records for your birth certificate, but not on another form. Would you like us to search DCFS records?” Disappointed, I told her sure, whatever. She also mentioned something about the confidential intermediary. That was it. More hurry up and wait. So now it could be up to 10 more weeks before we have any answers.
I also got a letter from DCFS’s Closed File Information and Search Service updating me on my request status. Next, closed DCFS files in a central storage facility will be searched for anything pertaining to my case, a process that could take several weeks to several months.
If this central file search fails, other agencies of DCFS will be contacted; this part might have to be repeated several times to gather all the relevant information. All of which could take several more months. If and when my files are found, I’ll be assigned a caseworker when one becomes available. If my files are NOT found, MAC will help me petition the court to assign me a confidential intermediary. At this point, in an attempt to stoke my dying patience, I’m trying to imagine myself a year from now, reflecting fondly back on the past year’s events and wondering why I ever doubted that everything would work out for the best. Lately it seems like there’s no end in sight. I also remind myself of the many searchers—parent and child—who have sought answers for a lifetime; it gives me the jolt of perspective I need to keep things in balance. I’ve only just begun to search. Will I be one of the millions who come up empty?